Tickets Now Available for Second Chicago Live Show!

Paying subscribers nabbed all 175 tickets to the first one in 31 hours. Now it’s your turn!

Link first, explanation later.

OK, so as explained here on Sunday, The Fifth Column’s Aug. 17 live show at Chicago’s Constellation club, billed as “An Evening with The Fifth Column (and Friends),” sold out in 31 hours, despite only being advertised to Never Fly Coach subscribers, plus our other paying customers for just seven hours apiece. This glaring demand/supply imbalance could have justified a later show that same night, but nobody with experience in the dark arts of Jeppson's Malört could in good conscience countenance such a medical experiment.

So! A second show has been added, in the heat of the summer night of Aug. 16, same bat-time, same bat-place, same now-obviously-below-market price of $38. And though we’re tasked with twice the booking, I feel more than comfortable making the same promises as before: Beloved surprise guests. A figure of national political import. Performative acts of derring-do not previously attempted on a Fifdom stage. Access to ever-elusive merch (including, I have a weird hunch, bootleg items involving sneks). And of course the fun of hanging out in meatspace with your fellow brave-being bullshit-callers. All against the looming catastrophe of the 2024 Democratic National Convention. This is going to be epic, people.

Does this consumer response make us want to do more live shows, including perhaps at larger venues? Why yes indeed it does! With that in mind, here is your perhaps poignant reminder that paid subscriptions get you early access, even moreso at the exclusive Never Fly Coach level.

All right, setting the stopwatch starting … now. Let’s see if the more numerous bloc of free subscribers can out-quick their paying brethren/sisteren. See you in two months!